Saturday, September 19, 2015

the thief who stole our hearts.


driving all the way to fort colonge to get my new/old camping trailer safety-checked may have seemed odd to many. to me, it made perfect sense. it was a chance to get the rig out on the road, view a few places i'd never seen while avoiding the big city.

waiting for the camper to be checked out, i found a great lunch spot. i absolutely recommend the restaurant to any other hard-core vegetarians who happen to be passing through fort colonge. it's called 'the steak house.' it's a steak house called 'the steak house.' that's like calling a whore house 'the whore house.' you can be pretty sure what's being offered there. that being said, you may be wondering why i would recommend 'the steak house' to vegetarians. well, i learned by escorting my dad to his favourite restaurants that steak houses really know how to make baked potatoes. besides, it's the only restaurant in town. i had a wonderful baked potato experience, with butter and sour cream, along with a perfectly adequate chef's salad.

the safety inspection went well, but as i drove out of the yard i realized i'd been robbed. my ipad was gone. it was not in my truck and there was no doubt about it. i've been robbed many times in my life so i am very familiar with the feeling. i know when i've been robbed.

in india, thieves were a problem at the ashram. as westerners, we were considered wealthy, which was largely true by comparison, of course, but not always. i was, for example, one of those who arrived poor as a church-mouse. i assume church-mice really are poor. nevertheless, one of my jobs there over time became a kind of night-watchman.

there was one thief, i recall well, who presented quite a challenge. he was plaguing the ashram, very elusive, and i spent several nights patrolling. it almost felt like he was taunting me. nothing of tremendous value was taken: a shawl, a pair of pants, a book or two. a simple candle-holder was stolen even though it had been sitting right beside a nice western camera. it was a mystery.

in the middle of the third night i went home for a cup of tea, lay down for a minute and nearly fell asleep. i realized i'd lose the whole rest of the night if i didn't get up immediately to continue my search. so i patrolled until early morning. but, as soon as i returned home i saw that my place had been broken into. i had been robbed while out looking for the thief. the only thing missing was my basketball shoes, which actually i treasured.

during the very next night a man was spotted climbing out of somebody's window and i ran down to the road. everyone was yelling: "he went this way!" "no, he went that way!" one of the indian guys kept insisting that the thief had just run down to the river. i was about to head off down the hill when i happened to notice the guy was wearing my shoes. i grabbed him, but he was quick, ran like the dickens in my 'nikes'. he was driving me nuts.

we caught him two nights later, cowering under a table in guruji's kitchen. i threw the table over and grabbed the man. i was marching him to the door when one of guruji's daughters asked me to wait. pointing out that the fellow looked petrified, cold and hungry, she insisted he eat first. i tried to point out that it was inappropriate, only i was outnumbered. her two sisters and one brother all agreed that the thief needed food. it was surreal to watch the thief being served vegetable-curry and rice with chai and then sweet gulab-jamans for desert. he seemed to grow more comfortable with each mouth-full, smiling over at me and thanking everyone again and again. afterward, we just let him go.

he turned up the very next night, carrying a large sack. in front of the meditation hall, he emptied it, producing shawls, shirts, books, some cutlery, my shoes, even a couple of pots. those of us who were there at the time were spell-bound as he presented each item as though it was a gift. we laughed at the theatrical way he saluted as he walked down the steps in the end. and we never saw him again.

in fort colonge, at the precise moment that i realized i'd been robbed, a mountain of a man came running out of the office of the garage. he was hollering 'arret! arret!' while waving my ipad above his head. apparently, i'd left it in the waiting room.


No comments :

Post a Comment