what exactly’s on its way.

sometimes, when i’ve just returned home and walked in the door, i call out: “honey i’m home!” some might consider that odd seeing as i live alone. and i talk to my geranium too. mostly, however, i just talk to myself, alot. and recently i’ve had quite a debate going on, and so have i. the question was: do i pull the trigger on the purchase of a new ipad or not. and eventually my less practical better half won out. 

next i debated whether to buy it on-line or simply drive in to ‘staples.’ but i hadn’t been out and about in over two months. and folks of a certain vintage are still being encouraged to die alone in our lazy-boys until further notice. and anyway an ipad could hardly be considered an essential item, as much as it might feel like it these days. it aint food, medicine or toilet paper. anyway, originally it seemed that if anyone could be fine self-isolating for a month or three it should be me. well, i’ve been fine at home, only now i’m no longer sure how to dress, how to behave. so i purchased the ipad on-line.

the transaction of course went smoothly enough. of course that part was easy. of course you know these items cost a helluva lot and of course ‘apple’ snatched the funds up immediately. i received their gracious email receipt and then of course i waited, and i waited. ten days later i looked down at the ipad on my lap and, yup, it was the same old one with the cracks: time to check the parcel’s status. 

that’s when, after using the tracking number, i saw that the ipad was nicely wrapped and ready to leave... china. i had had no idea. no wonder it was taking so long to arrive. and i gotta admit that overall it felt a bit weird. at the risk of joining brian adams in the dog-house, or the wet-market as it were, i immediately envisioned some poor shlub in wuhan assembling the thing while coughing and wheezing. i couldn’t help myself. i have a vivid imagination. i pictured the ipad arriving, transmitting a clear spectacular picture along with covid-19 and me dying a slow death, even though i had the additional ‘apple care’ warranty. 

be that as it may, tonight, as i languish in my lazy-boy chatting with my geranium, i realize that i’m really not in a rush. and a voice inside my head keeps whispering: ‘i told you so, you idiot.’